Hello,
I'm Brenda

This work came from living it.

Let's talk about what brought me here.

This Didn't Start As a Brand

F*ck IT Theory — Find IT didn’t begin as a brand or a plan.
It began with a pause.
A quiet realization that something was missing.
Many people spend years being dependable and strong.

Meeting expectations.

Saying yes on repeat.

Carrying responsibilities.

And over time, the connection to themselves grows faint.
This isn’t about checking out or not caring.

F*ck IT Theory isn’t about turning away from life—it’s about turning toward what matters.
Letting go of what no longer fits so you can reconnect with what does and Find IT—the part of you that feels real.

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The Pause that Changed Everything

Three years ago, Brenda began writing Thoughts From My She Shed while searching for something creative that still honored balance and brought her genuine joy.
She was, in her own way, trying to Find her IT.
The intention was simple: to be real. Really real.
About life. About aging. About creativity. About the messy in-between.

But over time, she hesitated. She softened her voice. Edited her thoughts. Pulled back.

Not because she didn’t have something to say— but because she didn’t want to offend or explain herself. That pause became the realization: before you can fully Find your IT, you often have to let go. That’s where F*ck IT Theory — Find IT began.

Choosing Herself

At 65, Brenda knew she wasn’t finished.
Not even close.

She wasn’t looking to start over.
she was looking to come home to herself.
Choosing herself meant releasing what no longer fit
and making room for what felt true.
That choice became F*ck IT Theory— Find IT.

Not as rebellion.
Not as recklessness.
But as a grounded, intentional way of letting go
so what matters most could rise to the surface.

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Brenda smiling and holding a silver bottle, celebrating a joyful moment

Why I use the word, and what it actually means

The word Fuck is used here intentionally.
Not for shock value. Not to provoke.

For centuries, it’s been used to express, emphasis, release, and truth, especially when softer words fall short.

In F*ck IT Theory, it isn’t about anger or dismissal. It’s about permission. Permission to drop guilt, loosen expectations, and stop carrying what no longer fits.

If the word gives you pause, that’s okay. Take what resonates.
Leave the rest.

You’re still welcome here, even if you replace the word with fun, freedom, or something that fits your style.

It cuts through the noise when softer words won't

It means permission, not anger or dismissal

It invites you to be as real as you actually are.

What I Actually Believe in

This work rests on three things that matter. Not theories I read somewhere, but truths I've lived and learned the hard way.

Let go of what no longer feels true.

Reclaim your energy without hardening.

Take life seriously—but not yourself.

Choose honesty, even when it takes courage.

Say yes to what genuinely feels like a hell yes!

My Business Manager:

Angel is my constant companion and unofficial co-creator of F*ck IT Theory.

She’s there for the quiet mornings in the She Shed, the card pulls that land a little too close to home, and the moments when I need to pause, breathe, and remember what actually matters.

If this work is about listening to yourself, trusting your instincts, and softening into what’s true, Angel has been modeling that wisdom all along.

She reminds me to rest when it’s time, to play when the moment calls for it, and to stay rooted in the present.

In many ways, she’s part of the heartbeat behind this work.

These aren’t rules.
They’re touchstones.

Ways to come back to yourself
and reconnect with Your IT when life gets loud.

At the heart of this work is a belief that:

Letting go makes room for clarity

Humor heals and honesty frees

Joy is allowed, not earned

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F*ck It Cards deck featuring an illustrated hand and the phrase Divine Guidance Zero Apologies

Brenda's Role in All of This

Brenda isn’t here to fix you. You’re not broken.
She’s not here to tell you who to be. You already know. You just might have misplaced the memo.

She’s here to walk alongside you while you let go of what’s not working
and Find IT—that spark, pull, or quiet "oh" you are feeling.

With a background in leadership, consulting, community service,
and a very real title of Vice President of Fun, Brenda has spent decades helping people reconnect with joy, clarity, and confidence.

Her work blends humor, wisdom, and lived experience, a reminder that the most freeing moments often begin when we stop performing…
and start being ourselves again.

The Heart of the Theory

When you stop forcing, fixing, and performing,
you create space to hear yourself again.

That’s where your IT shows up, not as something to chase, but as something you recognize.

You don’t need to become someone new.
You just need room to remember who you already are.

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Sometimes the bravest thing you can say is also the simplest: F*ck It!

Not to life, but to what no longer fits.
That’s often where you begin to Find “IT”!

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Legal Disclaimer: The F*ck It Theory is a personal framework created by Brenda and reflects her individual perspectives and experiences. It is not a formal theory, clinical practice, or evidence-based methodology. Nothing on this website—including cards, written content, or experiences—is intended as medical, psychological, legal, or professional advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance specific to your situation. By engaging with this content, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own interpretations, choices, and actions.

Hello,I'm Brenda